Saturday, February 14, 2009

CHEST HAIR CHALLENGE: BALDWIN VS. SELLECK

There are obviously two main contenders in the battle for the Best 80's Chest Hair title: Mr. Tom Selleck and Mr. Alec Baldwin. But who wins the trophy? Below you will find an analysis of each man's pectoral carpet, but in the end, the decision belongs to you, the Reader.

Let your voice be heard!



You can't beat Selleck's chest hair for consistency. Tightly curled and well-manicured, his evenly-distributed front rug has a nice, dense mid-pec cluster which cascades downward to the crotch region in a narrow, perfectly symmetrical V. Hair diminishes in density toward the outer pectoral region, giving his small nipples some much needed exposure. All in all, a chest hair home run.



Baldwin's advantage is overall thickness and a nice dispersion of hair in the upper clavicle region. While Selleck's chest hair is concentrated in a straight line down the middle of his torso, Baldwin has a nice cluster of hair underneath his man-boobs, giving his hair a pleasant, cross-shaped pattern. His Happy Trail is dark and nicely centered down the middle of his abdominal area, while his nipples are nearly invisible due to a plethora of tit-fuzz. Another chest hair home run, but superior to that of the mighty Thomas Magnum?

Discuss.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Congratulations on your most homo-erotic post ever. Nice touch on Valentine's Day.

Oh, and Selleck by a yard.

Steven said...

I'm feeling really inadequate right now.

Anonymous said...

Selleck

Erik said...

Selleck has the edge because his mustache is like chest hair on his face.

Tamara said...

While I am not generally a huge fan of chest hair, I definitely have to go with Tommy boy. Although my decision may be influenced by the photos/poses you chose... Those pastel striped shorts are hotter than hot, especially with the way he's kind of pulling out the waistband, supposedly to 'air out' his nether regions, but more likely ihe's trying to give his buddy with the strange square-shaped butt-patch a glimpse of his considerable package.

Shelby Cobras said...

Yep, it's Selleck by far.

And just for a recap, it's totally OK for me to put up something really homoerotic from time to time, but when my own sister chimes in, speculating about Tom Selleck's junk, a line has been crossed. That's gross, Tamara. you've been warned.

now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go grow some chest hair on my face.

JudyM said...

No way. There is no time, place, nor person with whom discussion of Tom Selleck's junk is off-limits.

Also, for what it's worth, I pushed hard for naming our rooster Thomas Magnum, but Matt wore me down and won that little argument.

Tamara said...

Uh oh! That was me in the last post. I guess JudyM forgot to sign out of Google the last time she used this computer!

Wouldn't Judy be mortified to have it thought that she posted online about Tom Selleck's giblets???

- Your loving sister.

Anonymous said...

Tbh they both have nice amount but I think baldwins is mor attractive In my opinion It looks like it would feel better to stroke your hands through and like stuff with. More turned on by baldwin