Sunday, February 5, 2017

DEATH METAL DADS: EPISODE 16 - DAD CONGREGATION



We're one bullet away from a gay President. And that's pretty cool. 

1,000 listener emails, Dad Sex, Fatherly Advice, The DMD Bump, live audio from the Dads' appearance at SF Sketchfest 2017, and a bonus Death Metal Drive Thru courtesy of Chase from Gatecreeper.
Music:
Dead Congregation, "Martyrdoom/Hostis Humani Generis", "Subjugation"
Blood, Sweat and Tears, "And When I Die"

Contact: illogicalcontraption@yahoo.com

NIGHTS AFTER DARK: EPISODE 76 - LE FLAT EARTH




Jesus take the wheel! I’m flying solo. Topics include: Trump numerology, Flat Earth memes, Musical frequencies distorting your reality, and Freemason hackers attacking the ECB. Come along, come along, come along.


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Send me some alien porn please: nightsafterdark@gmail.com

Sunday, January 22, 2017

NIGHTS AFTER DARK: EPISODE 75 - NATIONAL TREASURE III: RETURN OF THE HOT BREATH




WOW! It's a VERY SPECIAL EPISODE of Nights After Dark! With an ALL STAR CAST featuring Sara, Al, and Welf! We dive deep on the IllCon Sketchfest show, the CIA's remote viewing program, and the intricacies of the National Treasure franchise. It's a real good time for the whole family, except for all the swears and alien porn discussion.


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Sunday, January 15, 2017

DEATH METAL DADS: EPISODE 15 - ABNORMALLY DADCEASED (with Dave Adelson)



Join the Dads and their very special guest Dave Adelson (20 Buck Spin) for a mind-blowing journey into the heart of darkness, the soul of silliness, the mouth of madness, and the butt of jokes.

Discussed herein: The Mistake By The Lake, Part 2, The Harrowing Tale of the 15-Inch Burrito, Shelby Does Not Know The Guest's Name, Contra Costa County's Rich Metal History, What Max Bowman Smells Like, More Talk About The Steve DiGiorgio Statue, Fundamental Misunderstandings About Distance And Time, Sports Bars, Face-Punching, Bike Rides, Aesop's Mouth Gets A Timeout, A Trip To Applebee's, An Unpleasant Hill, HM-2 Pedals, Pinning The Sadness-ometer, Sour Cream Stains, The Hellwitch House, A Chance For Shelby To Perform His Infamous Jello Biafra Impersonation, A Gratuitous Mention of Broken Hope, Playing On Demos That Don't Exist, Driving Angry, A Shout Out To Mortiis, Cancer THE BAND, Climorta Skuld, Wild Rags Chat, Dudes That Kill Their Moms, Lack of Research, The Guitarist From Pearl Jam's Uli Jon Roth Cover Band, Collecting Paul Lynde Memorabilia, Necropolis Records and Condiments and The Loo, Fake-Tittied Nuns, The DMD Bump, and, of course, Fatherly Advice. This one REALLY doesn't suck very bad!

Music:

Entombed, "Abnormally Deceased"

Queen, "All Dead, All Dead"





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Contact the Dads! illogicalcontraption@yahoo.com

Sunday, January 1, 2017

NIGHTS AFTER DARK: EPISODE 74 - WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH ANTARCTICA?




Look, it’s a solo Nights After Dark episode. If you’re listening, you probably know what to expect. I get drunk and talk about Antarctica. It’s highly magical.


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DEATH METAL DADS: EPISODE 14 - MULTIPLE DAD WOUNDS


In 2017’s very first episode of DMD, Aesop and Shelby ride a veritable carousel of questionable and low-brow topics, in a laudable (no wait, AUDIBLE) effort to make sense of the cruel and death-filled month that was December 2016. It’s a colon-cleansing romp of epic proportions!

Discussed herein: Truth and Freedom in Podcasting, Facefucked By Mr. Belding, All He Wanted Was A Chocolate Milk, Hate Mail From John Hand, Brett Hoffmann’s Feelings About The Broward County Jail, A Fecal “Irish Goodbye”, Carrie Fisher Chat, The Cut of George Michael’s Jib, Dan Blocker From Television’s ‘Bonanza’, The Dune Holiday Special, Cynthia Rothrock You Like A Hurricane (Of Martial Arts and Mom Jeans), The Anal-conda, Chris Hansen: TV’s #1 Cock-Blocker, Sweatpants Chat, Aesop’s Abortion, Shelby’s Speed-Pill Addiction, A Gyroscopic Thing Flying Into A Butthole In Space, Jeff Goldblum’s Cock, Suspicions About Rototomas’ Sobriety, Spermicidal Tendencies, Chugging NyQuil, Assholes From Modesto, Nuclear War Later!, The Finished-Upon Obituary Hat, Psyllium Husk Pro Tips, Rum-Chata, Cleveland: The Mistake By The Lake, Empty Nest, Dear John, and Other Sad 90’s TV Shows, Bus Boners, Extremely Liberal Use of the Word “Faggot”, The Strange and Public Termination of Gus Rios, The DMD Bump, Fatherly Advice, and a heaping portion of unsolicited “bonus material". It sucks, but you’ll learn to like it. Don’t take it personal.

Music:

Malevolent Creation, “Multiple Stab Wounds”

Q Lazzarus, “Goodbye Horses”



Contact us: illogicalcontraption@yahoo.com

Sunday, December 18, 2016

NIGHTS AFTER DARK: EPISODE 73 - FAILED SACRIFICE OF THE YEAR




Have you been feeling CONFUSED recently? Has reality CRUMBLED around you? Don’t panic! Just sit back, relax, and let Charles and I expose the occultic deep state engines driving the chaos of the world, and why Kim Kardashian of all fucking people is the lynchpin holding everything together.


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Sunday, December 4, 2016

DEATH METAL DADS: EPISODE 13 - UNQUESTIONABLE PRESENTS (A Non-Denominational Christmas Miracle with Jackie Perez-Gratz & AJ Gregory)



Pour yourself a nog and stuff those stockings--it's a brand new top-secret Holiday episode of DMD featuring Jackie Perez-Gratz (Giant Squid, Grayceon, Amber Asylum) and Aaron John Gregory (Giant Squid, Khorada, Squalus)!
It's a wacky, family-friendly thrill ride, with lots of silly chat about topics such as: Abortion, Intra-uterine Cannibalism, Child Murder, Nazis, Terrorism, Large Men Having Sex In Small Toyota Paseos, Prehistoric Sharks, Jimmy Buffett Metal, Laundry Day Metal, Cocaine, Winters Tavern, Midriff-Baring Shirts, Really Short Jogging Shorts, Green Jelly, Jello Biafra, Cello Biafra, Green Cello, Izzy Stradling, Yanni DiFranco, Sensible Footwear, Dental Hygiene, Impolite Off-Mic Chatter From Both Ezra The Producer And Pepper The Infant, Listener Emails, Dad Sex, The DMD Bump, and of course, everyone's favorite segment, Fatherly/Motherly Advice. Have a listen, won't you?
Music:

Atheist, "Mother Man"

Giant Squid, "Neonate"





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Contact the Dads: illogicalcontraption@yahoo.com

NIGHTS AFTER DARK: EPISODE 72 - LOOKING FOR OWLS




Wow it’s a solo show! Subjects rambled about include: Listener Corrections, Jesus’s True God, Timewave Zero and the Transcendental Object At The End Of Time, Tarot Cards on the 2017 Economist, and Operation Werewolf! It's a wholesome good time for the whole family. Minimal swears. (But still a few swears.)


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MESSAGE ME IF YOU DARE: nightsafterdark@gmail.com

Sunday, November 27, 2016

NIGHTS AFTER DARK: EPISODE 71 - THE LIGHT BEHIND THE WALL




Tune on, turn out, and drop in as Charles and I pull back the curtain to reveal the physical and metaphysical engines driving the chaos of your present reality. Not gonna spoil the surprises, but this one goes hard in the paint.


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MESSAGE NAD: nightsafterdark@gmail.com