Sunday, January 21, 2018

DEATH METAL DADS: EPISODE 34 - DADSPONDENT SOULS


The enemies of Robb Flynn are the enemies of America.
Music:
Immolation: “Despondent Souls”
Parliament Funkadelic (with Buckethead, maybe?): “Hideous Mutant Freekz”
SOUNDCLOUD



DIRECT DL


Contact: illogicalcontraption@yahoo.com

NIGHTS AFTER DARK: EPISODE 99 - BIT LIT




So Many Bitcoin Jams / No Forests On Flat Earth / Leftover Sketchfest Jams / Maybe Some Other Stuff Too I Can't Remember


Direct Download
Listen on Stitcher
Subscribe on iTunes

Check out our NEW ILLCON SITE

Email: nightsafterdark@gmail.com

Wednesday, January 10, 2018

DEATH METAL DADS: EPISODE 33 - SLUMBER OF SWOLLEN GUYS (with EZRA LUX)



In DMD’s first episode of 2018, the Fathers convene on a cold, rainy night in East Oakland with nepotistic third-time guest Ezra Lux to discuss a generation-spanning selection of topics ranging from racism to Taco Bell, soda pop brands to film history, and conspiracy theories to Finnish death metal. Will Producer Ezra’s mind withstand the shitstorm of psychic malevolence? Will Shelby learn to differentiate between Bill S. Preston, Esquire, and Ted Theodore Logan? Will Aesop remain awake? Tune in to find out!
Also blathered upon most non-heinously: A Trip Down Memory Lane (Horse Meat, Soy, and Grease), Dennis Quaid-Randy Quaid-Beau Bridges-Lloyd Bridges-Jeff Bridges-Jeff Daniels-Anthony Daniels-Daniel Day-Lewis-Anthony Kiedis, As Real As The Streets, Gay Jail, Tyler The Kreator, Does Finland Exist?, No Sprite Served Here, Doug E. Fresh: Rappin’ Scientologist, DMD2: Spring Fever, DMD3: Death Metal Dads In Space, DMD4: Death Metal Dads vs Leprechaun, and DMD5: Death Metal Dads vs Logan Paul vs Leatherface In Da Hood, Jimmy Stewart: Wife-Murdering Clown, Racial Insensitivity And Ezra Using The Word “Faggot”, Man Eggs And Bisketti, Freaked Chat, Oscarbaiting, “Urban Marketing” And The Average American Teenager, Unsolicited Alabama Football Notifications, “Special” “Rallies”, Elementary School Field Trip To The Suicide Forest, Burning The Midnight Oil, Brooke Shields, The Older Brother From “Blossom”, Okay In Small Doses, Reindeer Meat With A Zig-Zag of Fancy Sauce, Fuzzy Tingly Feelings In Your Brain And Private Areas, Gibby Haynes vs Larry “Bud” Melman, DMD Gets Their Own Show On The Disney Channel, Sex As A Child, Toxic Waste And Mutants And Shit, 2018 Coachella Lineup Announcements, Vladimir Putin Fucks A Poodle, The Poe Man’s Podcast,  Naming Actors, Naming Bands, And Naming Movies, Mustained, Twitter Beefs, Solving Colorblindness With Bitcoin, The Ghost of The Dead Grandma From Family Circus, Holocaust Denial, The DMD Bump (Self-Love Edition), and, as always, Fatherly Advice. Consume it!
Music:
Demigod, “Dead Soul”
Charlie Daniels, “In America”


SOUNDCLOUD



DIRECT DL

THE DEATH METAL DADS ARE PERFORMING LIVE THIS FRIDAY 1/12  10:30PM AT CAFE DU NORD IN SAN FRANCISCO AS PART OF ILLOGICAL CONTRAPTION’S THIRD ANNUAL APPEARANCE IN SF SKETCHFEST. YOU CAN GET A TICKET BY CLICKING RIGHT HERE.

Contact: illogicalcontraption@yahoo.com

Sunday, January 7, 2018

NIGHTS AFTER DARK: EPISODE 98 - SKY HIGH CATFISH CABIN




IllCon Live Show Chat / Conspiracy Music B-Sides / Let Me Express / CIA Qigong Investigations / Chemtrail Cowboy / Dear Prudence / As Far As The Eye Can See / Bass Pro Shops at the Memphis Pyramid / Gary, You Love Brussel Sprouts / What If They Were Lying?


Direct Download
Listen on Stitcher
Subscribe on iTunes

Check out our NEW ILLCON SITE

Email: nightsafterdark@gmail.com

Sunday, December 17, 2017

DEATH METAL DADS: EPISODE 32 - SOON TO BE DAD (with GARZO)


Shelby and Aesop are joined by Peruvian maniac Garzo (Los Huaycos) to smash the language barrier sans phone service or microphones and uncover the truth about foreign Santas, time-travelling prog rock bands, future pyramids, and hairless dogs. 

Also discussed: Night Ranger Or Power Ranger?, A Guitar That Turns Into A Motorcycle, Cans vs Bottles of Beer And The Perils of Drunken Skateboarding, Shitpussies And Buttholes And Vaginas, Leafblower Week At The Yamaha Factory, Where's The Mayonnaise?, Fred Etsy, Drummer of Dismember, Lawrence of A Labia, Hulk-Cucking, Klingon Bukkake, Toilet Paper Hacks (Toilet Paper That You Cannot See), 13 Reasons Why Los Huaycos Are The Cannibal Corpse of Netflix, A Spoiling Alert, All This Fucking Shit That Is Happening, Looking For A Job In The Milky Way, Sucking The Nipple, Sharpening The Pen, Ricky Henderson In The 90s, Human Evolution And The Upside-Down, The Secret Broken Phone (Don't Tell My Wife), A Speedo And A Razor, Super Friends From Peru, Drugs And Fucking, Hebrew College, A Hundred Dollar Idea, The Trouble With Tribbles And Cum, Horny Goat Weed, Randy Scottish Basilisk Powder, Romulan Porno And The Roddenberry Estate, Being More Like Fabio, A Pinch of Nutmeg Around The Holidays, Making Christmas White Again, Sometimes In The Mountains They Don't Get Presents, Rush Rash, A Possibly Non-Existent Band Called Placebo, Jose Canseco (A Shitty Landlord), Finding Pizza In Your Bed, Hitler And UFOs And The Hollow Earth And The Illuminatus! Trilogy, Semen In Garzo's Dad's Penis, International Habits of Taxi Drivers, Falling Asleep On BART, A Drunk Santa In Your Uber, Fluorescent Birdhouses, A Special Non-Denominational Holiday Message From The Death Metal Dads, Heinous Hoodies, Garzo Only (No Mike), The DMD Bump, and, of course, Fatherly Advice. This one is punk as FUCK.

Music:

Dismember, "Soon To Be Dead"

Los Huaycos, "Huaycal Animal"

Cannibal Corpse, "The Bleeding" and Tears For Fears, "The Hurting" played at the same time

(PS Yngwie J. Malmsteen totally WAS in G3. Suck it Aesop.)

NIGHTS AFTER DARK: EPISODE 97 - SKI SCHOOLS OF THE ASTRAL PLANE




It's a solo episode! Easily the most fun I've had talking to myself recently. Very serious topics include: Net Neutrality / Cryptocurrencies / The Monroe Institute and the True Nature of Consciousness / Yuppie Meditations / Accelerating Science / Ghost Hunting Judicial Nominees / Ghost Dick / Bill Cooper and Lucifer 2000 / Walter Tyler and Jack Straw / Tuscaloosa Synchronicity


Direct Download
Listen on Stitcher
Subscribe on iTunes

Check out our NEW ILLCON SITE

Email: nightsafterdark@gmail.com

Sunday, December 3, 2017

DEATH METAL DADS: EPISODE 31 - MITHRADADTIC (with PAUL RYAN)


In today's installment, the Dads convene upstairs at The DNA Lounge in scenic San Francisco with one-man wrecking crew Paul Ryan (Origin) to discuss licks, riffs, shreds, dicks, and donuts. It's a veritable buffet of off-color topics, ending in a crescendo of shame and horror. Join us!

Also open for debate: Your Dad's Dick, Shred Begley Jr., More Than a Feeling, Death Metal Dads (Now On Netflix), Dead On A Cruise Ship, How Sociopathetics Clip Your Toenails, BYOB Strip Clubs, Mostly Cum And Farts, The Entire Shipping Department At Camco Drum Pedals, An Automotive Diagnostic of Death Metal Music, Hot Takes About Obituary, Now With The Internet And Everything, The VP of Sweeps, Hitler Was A Vegan, Infernal Hailz/Come To Brasil, "Nature Is My Jam", Dez Cadena In A Dashiki, Topeka/Tapioca, Good Times At The Maritime Hall (RIP) and The Pound (RIP), A Lot Of Talk About Gorefest, Paul's Seaside Estate, George Lucas vs Lucas Mann, An Intimate Phone Encounter, Hatebreed Hatespeech, Fairly Biblical, The Car Crash Story, Exhumed And Their Halfway House Program, A "Covfefe" Reference, Bad Ideas For "Bonus Content", Thrash Metal Bangs, Our Stupid Ass Show, NASCAR's Mike Smith, Suffocation's Mike Smith, Strange Things Afoot In The Back Room At Guitar Center, Shelby's Racism... Exposed!, If At The Gates Were Younger And More Attractive, Steel Toe Abortions, Rubik's Cubes And Rotary Phones, The Benefits of A Plant-Based Diet, A Wizard In A Garage Making Amps and Pedals, Sixty Acres of Land In Marin, Mike And The Mechanics Chat, A Black Metal Band In Tennis Clothing, "The Bleeding", "The Hurting", "The Wizard of Oz", and "Dark Side of The Moon", Gangbanging For God, A Simply Red Cassette In A Nissan Pathfinder, The Fixie Bikes And The Ironic Moustaches, Four Kinds of Vegan Donuts, Phobiaphobic, Fatherly Advice, and of course, The DMD... Plug?

Music:

Origin, "Mithradatic"

The Manson Family, "Scratching Peace Symbols In Your Tombstone"




DIRECT DL

Contact: illogicalcontraption@yahoo.com

NIGHTS AFTER DARK: EPISODE 96 - GREAT FERMI TRANSCENSION PARADOX FILTER THING




Where are all the aliens? Will and I tackle the massive, cosmos-spanning subject of the Fermi Paradox. What is the Great Filter? Are we headed for transcension? Tune in to hear us wildly speculate!


Direct Download
Listen on Stitcher
Subscribe on iTunes

Check out our NEW ILLCON SITE

Email: nightsafterdark@gmail.com

Sunday, November 19, 2017

DEATH METAL DADS: EPISODE 30 - SONORAN DADPRAVATION (with CHASE MASON and NATE GARRETT)


In this week's scandalous sequence, the Dads venture into the basement-level dressing rooms of Slim's in San Francisco for a mid-evening tryst with Chase Mason and Nate Garrett (Gatecreeper, Spirit Adrift). The fetid foursome find favor, and float fetishized fallacies for a fervent fifty-five (f)minutes. Listen in, and be shocked by the episode's (literal) climax!
What else is in here? Observe: A Cuckhold Discussion/Cumming On The Baby, Joshua Bling Bling, Aesop Has To Pee, Shooting Up With Boz Scaggs, Shawn Doing Weed Stuff, Moustaches And Vaping And Lies And Fidget Spinners, The Power Trippin' Rabbi, The Cost of A Gold Tooth In 2017, Buying The DMD Bump, A Message To Mom, David Lynch With Down Syndrome, Tool Fans, Lurking Rob Barrett In The Alley In The Rain, Mormon Rules About Facial Hair, Brigham Young vs Bring 'Em Young, "Recommendations For You", The OTHER Chick From Vastum, Idris Elba vs Paul Baloff, Long And Hard (But Mostly Hard), Every Woman Sitting On A Cake, Cryptopsy Taco Supremacy, Group Chat Chat, Origins of The Pingy Snare, Herpes vs "Mic Rash", Attila's Traveling Hairstylist, If Gatecreeper Was A Movie, Lots of Rotting Meat On Set, White People In The Kitchen, The Spirit of Full Disclosure, The M. Night Shyamalan of Shameful Masturbation, Jessica Tandy's PornHub Page, Incriminating Talk About Meth, John Leguizamo Getting His Dick Stuck In A Bottle, Legitimately Weirded Out, Death Metal Drive Thru, The Heyday of Mediafire, LMFAO (Lick My Fuckin Ass Out), Chuck Norris/Chuck Taylor, A Total Candy-Ass, Hockey Without The Sticks, Michael Jordan's Hitler Moustache, Musings On Crud Wizard And Luxury Factory, Action Pants, Not "Drunk" Just "Right", Phantasm Bros, Cosmic Hearse + Methadone, The Wet Bandits, Riffs And Fists, Troll 2 And The Gorilla With The Jetpack, The Thing About Aesop And That Movie "Spun", and a complete lack of all normalcy or regular segments. Enjoy responsibly!
Music:
Gatecreeper, "Craving Flesh"
Spirit Adrift, "Curse of Conception"


DIRECT DL

Contact: illogicalcontraption@yahoo.com


NIGHTS AFTER DARK: EPISODE 95 - WHO CREATED THE SOY BOY?




Charles and I discuss the role of Military AI in controlling US politics, personal identity, and reality itself. This one goes deep!


Direct Download
Listen on Stitcher
Subscribe on iTunes

Check out our NEW ILLCON SITE

Email: nightsafterdark@gmail.com