Tuesday, June 16, 2009
You know what? Fuck the haters. Rhapsody fucking rules and I don't care what you think about it.
Yeah, maybe they jumped the shark back in '06 when they changed their name to Rhapsody of Fire and decided to play "soundtrack metal" exclusively. Maybe 2005's Symphony of Enchanted Lands Part II was a flaccid sellout with way too much narration by Christopher Lee. But should someone throw out their copy of Master of Puppets just because Metallica turned into a bunch of Nazi yuppies a couple years later?
Here's the truth: Rhapsody put out NO LESS than four completely EPIC albums between 1997 and 2002, including this crown jewel, Dawn of Victory. In addition to being an absolutely mind-numbing shred-fest, the subject matter is 100% un-fuckwithable. Want songs about swords? Check out "Triumph of My Magic Steel". Unicorns? "The Last Winged Unicorn". Trolls? "Trolls In The Dark". Dwarves? "Village of Dwarves". How 'bout wizards? Rhapsody has you covered there too, with "Dargor, Shadowlord of The Black Mountain".
In case you've never actually HEARD Rhapsody (poor, poor souls), Illogical Bro TMM defined their sound nicely in a recent comment, calling them a mixture of Manowar and Queen. While I do find it to be a pretty accurate description, I hear a Hell of a lot of Dio and Maiden in there, too. Rhapsody is like an older, way less annoying, D&D-centric version of DragonForce, without the incomprehensible guitar wankery or rabid Blabbermouth controversies. You probably think you're "too cool" for Rhapsody. In reality, quite the opposite is true.
Stunning visual proof that Rhapsody was LARPing way before LARPing was "cool":