Saturday, May 16, 2009

Beyond The Drummer For Def Leppard

by The Heckler

I can imagine few things more unsettling than to lose a limb. No matter how awesome your severed-limb story you're still left with a stump, limited mobility and the confused-neurons that leave a phantom sensation of your lost appendage. Nevertheless, a man is defined more by how he reacts to adversity than by his experience of it, so should you find yourself in this predicament, consider your options.

You could get an awesome tattoo to scare kids with:

Or you could try and use it to gain an advantage in sports:

Another option is to get an awesome bionic arm like these AILF's did:

Some wacky people even use it as an opportunity to advance the world by say, becoming a mermaid:

...or comissioning an Eames-inspired prosthetic leg to one-up the christian god:

Some people try to advance science, like these cyclops who are trying to get camera's to fill their empty eye cavities:

The Eyeborg Project

Or this douche, who got a fucking USB-drive in his finger, which is like having an 8-track player installed into the dash of your '57 Rolls Royce:

I think embracing your reality and having some fun with it is also a good idea:

If you do go with a prosthetic, don't be embarassed. They've been around forever:

...and even the animal kingdom has been enriched by the loss of a limb:

Then again, there is a wrong way to do it:

Whatever you end up doing, make sure to take a moment and appreciate that there's something you can do that everyone else in the room usually can't.

Unless you're the drummer for Def Leppard, in which case you could really use that other arm.

Editors Note: Charles T Heckler is currently in posession of all of his limbs, rock!


Peter said...

So good.

Shelby Cobras said...

I hope the guy in the first picture got his arm bitten off by a shark. Otherwise, the idea might seem a little "silly".

Steven said...

I didn't need to see Lil' Willy. Begs to ask why I even looked...