CLOTHING IS STUPID

I have a very specific pet peeve: T-shirts featuring painfully unfunny "funny" quotes. Usually worn by drama geeks, former drama geeks, Dad Rockers, and Midwestern parents who fancy themselves "hip" or "wacky", these shirts miss the mark completely, and I just fail to see the humor in presenting the same joke, over and over again, as if it's going to eventually become witty.

Below: Three examples of stupid T-shirt quotes.



(Sorry, Ethan, but c'mon. Really?)





Rather than letting this vapid plague infuriate me, I've decided to face my anger, and print up some unfunny shirts of my own. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, right?
Although the printing process hasn't begun yet, I've designed some really dumb clothing, that I hope to market in small town college campuses and Midwest Wall-Marts. If any of these shirts interests you, just mail $20 in unmarked bills to the address to the right. I'll totally send you one. Totally.

Below: The first seven designs that will be printed at Illogical Contraption Laboratories, once funding is secured.