80s cult movie queen EG Daily (Pee Wee’s Big Adventure, Valley Girl) joins us in the first hour!
Filmmaker Craig Campobasso (Dune, Xtro 3, Tremors) schools us on real-life alien Valient Thor in the second hour! Listen now!
I've written a few pieces on my
admiration for various Central and South American metal bands and the
manner in which they could absorb the severity of their circumstances
into their music, transmuting it into an extremity paralleled by few
other artists before or since. Bands like Parabellum, Herpes, and
Hadez all churned out some of the most vicious, atonal, bomb-blast
anti-music ever commited to tape but I would hate to imply that all
the brutality of authoritarian regimes, drug-fuled corruption, and
some of the bloodier moments of Cold War spillover necessarily forced
musicians into the realms of quasi-listenable discordance. There
were antecedents, unique for their time and place but not really
remembered for the boundary pushing of their harsher followers.
V8 is one such band. They're widely
believed to be Argentina's first metal band and it's not hard to pick
out what they were attempting. Their first album, 1983's Luchando
Por El Metal (Fighting
For Metal – for those unversed
in Spanish) almost seems a sort of missing link between late NWOBHM
and early speed metal, but whereas the former genre was comprised of
bands who tended to release a killer EP or two and then either fall
apart or make an album consisting mainly of shitty filler material
and the latter focused more on technical ability and falsetto vocals,
Luchando Por El Metal is
rock solid and stocked front to back with well-written catchy tunes,
almost punk-ish in their rawness, not a million miles removed from a
rougher Kill 'Em All (which
was released four months later).
My
Spanish is a bit rusty, but from what I can tell V8's hatred of both
society and hippies was surpassed only by their devotion to heavy
metal (the introduction to “Parcas Sangrientas” gives way to the
heavily accented shout of “HEAVY MET-AL!” in case there was any
question or doubt where their alliegences lay). And it may be easy
to have a laugh at the single-mindedness of it all except for two
things: first, in 1979 Argentina was still a military dictatorship
that had withstood decades of de facto civil
war, withV8 forming during the most repressive era of that regime's
rule, a time when rock music was banned and anybody performing it did
so at their own peril – imprisonment and forced disappearances were
the order of the day – making the act of being in a metal band one
requiring a level of bravery most musicians would have trouble
mustering; and second, the album fucking rules. It's a total ripper,
a rager, a torpedo bonzer, and ass-pounder of the highest order.
Anybody who claims to like awesome things and doesn't like this needs
to take a good, long look at themselves in the mirror and try to
figure out where their head's at.
V8 may
have had some analogs in the Motörheads and Judas Priests of the
world, but to say their music wasn't new or different not only isn't
really the point, but it lays bare the cultural privelege at the
heart of being able to denigrate the relevance of something because
it's reminiscent of something else. V8 was
new and different, at least in relation to their corner of the world,
and their popularity there attests to the vacuum that they filled for
the generation of people who needed something as bracing, cathartic,
and anarchic as metal to be able to come to terms with a social
structure so rigorously and vehemently opposed to the freer
expressions of the human spirit. Also it fucking rules.
OHHHHH YEAH IT'S FOOTBALL SEASON, Y'ALL. GRAB SOME COLD CANS AND CRUSH EM' DOWN YOUR FUCKIN' THROAT. ARE YOU READY TO WATCH THE BOYS THROW SOME PIGSKIN?
Here at IllCon we aren't really into the "sports" world even though senior editor Shelby Cobras is commonly seen around the office wearing various metal branded basketball shorts.
The metal world has long been connected to the gridiron. The Oakland Raiders famously use AC/DC's "Hells Bells" when entering the field. The Kansas City Chiefs like to come out to Motley Crue's "Kickstart My Heart." As obscure as those songs are, my very favorite football themed song comes from the late Layne Staley's pre-Alice In Chains project aptly titled "Alice N' Chains" (formerly Sleeze). Their love letter to the game is one of the best slap-bass GnR ripoff songs of all time. Check out these lyrics:
(Yup. This is a real thing.)
Something that we ARE actively interested in are hard-to-find soundtracks. That's why I was stoked to come across this amazing gem of a collection - Autumn Thunder: 40 years of NFL Films Music. A 10 disc compilation highlighting the kick ass compositions that accompanied the overly dramatic and amazingly photographed NFL Films productions of the 1970s. This shit fucking rules. I couldn't find the whole thing and I doubt that any IllCon reader would download everything anyway. Here now are discs 5-9. It's PLENTY to hold you over until someone gets you the whole set for Hanukkah. Most of the set highlights the work of Sam Spence. Spence was a former music professor at USC, who while in Munich in 1966, was asked to score some highlight reels for the NFL. His work has since become iconic and his music just as much as part of American culture as the game itself. According to his wiki: "...he can arguably be credited with a significant role in making American football the top professional sport in the U.S." No lie. This dude rules. Also featured here are the songs of David Robidoux, Tom Hedden and William Soden.
“Dune. Desert Planet. Arrakis. WATER.” --Kyle McLaughlin, in Lynch’s Magnum Opus, Dune “Dune, where’s my car?” --Cobras
Many bands have tried and failed to capture the essence of Frank Herbert’s seminal, epic, orientalist space-opera, DUNE. For some, it might have been better if they had tried and died.
It would be well-nigh impossible to document every Dune-inspired track in the universe, so these are but a sampling of the many existing varieties of Dune music. They are grouped in brackets because, as Paul Atreides has observed, "the worst potential competition for any young organism can come from its own kind."
Techno Bracket Eon let loose in 1991 with a couple Dune-themed tracks, "The Spice Must Flow" and "Fear: The Mindkiller.""Fear: The Mindkiller"is a clear ancestor of the Mortal Kombat theme song, and samples (you guessed it!) the line "fear is the mind killer" a few thousand times. For good measure, Eon throws in a healthy dose of what sounds like the panting from Kraftwerk's "Tour De France." Because that's what Kraftwerk is awesome for-- panting.
Not shown: panting. Shown: nerding.
As bad as this may be, however, it’s still better than “German techno-pop ensemble from Münster Dune,” because by "techno pop" they mean Happy Hardcore. If you don’t know what that is, take a moment to thank the gods. You are either too young, too old, or were too under-a-rock-in-the-90s to have been exposed to this toxin. Preserve your innocence/health. If you must know, a representative track is "Can't Stop Raving,"but don't say I didn't warn you. Also, Dune’s youtube page would have you know that the group is “named after the 1984 science fiction movie directed by David Lynch.” Yup. Straight from the source.
Winner: no one. No one is a winner here.
Metal Bracket Another band of Krauts, Golem, attacked the Dune concept in their 1998 album “The 2nd Moon.” Check out the first track, The Wanderers. Featuring succinct riffage and abstract/subtly ESL lyrics (see e.g.: “Unlocking the gates of time, widening its bounds/Guarded by the maker ...facing desert ground”), Golem may actually have what it takes to make a Kwisatz Hadderach.
A further solid entry comes from Aussie rock band Buffalo (mentioned in a previous Cobras post), whose Dune Messiah takes us on a Pentagram-esque journey to Arrakis (and admit it, you always wanted to go to Arrakis with Pentagram).
Pretty sure it would be like this...
Blind Guardian also pays a visit to the Dune-iverse in Traveller in Time. The morning sun! Of Dune! Good old Blind Guardian. If you haven’t heard this song, it’s pretty much exactly what you would expect from Blind Guardian (i.e., it is awesome, unabashed nerdery). They can really play their balisets ifyouknowwhatimean.
Picard Knows.
Also, according to a reliable source (wikipedia, duh), Iron Maiden tried to name To Tame A Land “Dune,” but Frank Herbert was having none of it. Apparently the band was told that "Frank Herbert doesn't like rock bands, particularly heavy rock bands, and especially bands like Iron Maiden." Good call on that one, F. Herb.
Frank Herbert hates you.
PS: Dreamtheater fans will be delighted to admit to you that Dreamtheater covered "To Tame A Land." Winner: Vote your choice in the comments. You are the dungeonmaster! You get to decide!
Blind Guardian
Buffalo
Golem
Iron Maiden
Dreamtheater
Prog/Jazz Bracket
More to F. Herb’s taste might be the smooth stylings of one Dave Matthews (!), a jazz keyboardist from Kentucky who hung out with James Brown and was apparently moved to gather together a bunch of other jazz players (Grover Washington, Eric Gale) and write several Dune-themed songs which readers should check out at their own risk. These are all on a 1977 album Dave Matthews titled, wait for it, “Dune.” The creativity here just does not end... or at least, not until the second side of the album, where Dave gives us NOT ONLY a disco-fied version of the Star Wars main theme (it was 1977, so Lucas didn’t quite know what he had on his hands), but also a limp cover of David Bowie's Space Oddity. On a related note, the only tolerable part of the latter song was sampled by MF (“Metal Face/Fingers”) Doom in Rap Snitch Knishes. You know. Like you do. Wait, what was I talking about? Ah yes. Another entry in the Dune prog bracket are French prog rockers Dün, about whom we have previously heard. An interesting compare and contrast exercise may be done by playing Dave Matthew's "Arrakis" and Dün's “Arrakis” back to back. Go on. Try it.
Winner:
Dave Matthews
Dün
Video Game Bracket Yes, evidently there were at least two about a million soundtracked Dune videogames. Kids these days. Don’t they know about books? Require a little effort on your part, make no be-be-be-be-beeps. Anywho. 1992 saw the release of not one, but TWO Dune videogames. The first was called “Dune” by Cryo Interactive, and it carried a soundtrack called "Dune: Spice Opera." It’s not so bad, from what I can tell. Also, at 1:55 of the track embedded below, "Sign of the Worm," you can see a sweet rendering of Shai-Hulud in 1992 graphics.
A competing video game company, Westwood Studios, released “Dune II” that same year; check out this sweet dialogue: “We were your pawns and Dune was your board.” The score is basically 8-bit plus. In 1998, Westwood Studios released “Dune: 2000” scored in part by professional video game composer Frank Klepaki. Good old Frank K. does a musical homage to/rip off of Toto’s score to Lynch’s Dune here on this track at about 3:22-32; otherwise, this is fairly unremarkable stuff.
Winner:
Dune: Spice Opera
Dune II
Klepaki
No one, again
Dune OST Bracket The Lynch Dune OST has been reported on here, but I thought I might add a few words. Two of those words are "Brian Eno." Two more words are “fuck yeah.”
but of course there is a fuckyeaheno.com
For the sake of completeness, here is the theme music from the Dune television series, composed by the dude who did the soundtrack to Final Destination V. If you have ever watched any sci-fi movie and heard some generic background symphonics, you’ve basically heard it. Speaking of orientalism, there’s also a Bonus New Age Track.
Winner:Toto/Eno OST. I’m sorry, this is just objective. Please send your complaints to James Madison.
Well, there you have it, friends. A smattering of the aural representations of the Dune-iverse. Please feel free to add on in the comments.
Behold Kris Mar, newest addition to the IllCon Team! Hail Kris Mar! May the rivers run red with the blood of your fallen foes, and may vampires tremble and expire at your feet just as they do under the mighty ax of Abe Lincoln! I am impressed with the nerdiness contained herein, please feel free to contribute further in the future. Sweet.
Really?
Well over 3 and a half years of Illogical Contraption and no one has ever posted Fabio Frizzi's brilliant score to Lucio Fulci's (right) 1981 weirdo/gore/zombie/WTF/chiller The Beyond? This is inexcusable. Nigh unto treason. I scorn the entire writing staff for their oversight and laziness.
I found myself revisiting this film during a late-night bender just recently, and found myself once again blown away by a) the way everything in this movie happens for no apparent reason and applies to no real storyline (It's Italian, for fuck's sake! These flicks never make any sense.) b) that scene with the blind chick and her dog on the bridge (still super creepy), and c) THE FUCKING SOUNDTRACK, MAN! SO GOOD!!!
Despite the quality of Frizzi's compositions (past IC posts have explored the droning, minimalist genius of
City of the Living Dead/Gates of Hell and Zombi 2), he is far from "profilic" or "well known", recording just a handful of popular scores between the late 60's and today. Sure, his work on the first Zombie, Manhattan Baby, Argento's A Cat In The Brain, The Psychic, and Kill Bill Part 1 (known as Kiru Biru in Japan) have assured him his fair spot in the pantheon of great Italian film composers, but his renown remains mostly in his home country. Frizzi remains nestled comfortably within his own private Brozone Layer, pumping out the ill jams at a consistent--but not megalomaniacal--rate, always keeping it creepy, always keeping it gnar. Sick jams.
I think it's weird that everyone is talking about Sabbath reforming sans Bill Ward. Who the heck cares in 2012? Ozzy is a ghost of his former self, they play exactly zero deep cuts. Who get excited for this shit? Internet metal nerds? Dad? I don't know.
Let's take it back and look at what was up with Sabbath in 1983. Singer Ronnie James Dio just left the band along with then-drummer Vinnie Appice to start their own band Dio. The story goes: he had an epic battle with Iommi about the mixing of Live Evil (lol divas). Original Sabbath drummer Bill Ward was coaxed back in and the new singer was none other than the legendary Ian Gillan of Deep Purple fame.
The result? Well thats up for debate. To me Born Again is up there with Vol 4. and Masters as one of their heaviest records. I love Ian Gillan's voice. Love it. Jesus Christ Superstar is one of my favorite rock records ever (Gillan plays Jesus, n00bs) and (in my opinion) his vocals worked perfectly with Iommi's evil riffage. The album was not received well by the public and generally trashed by the music press. I think thats weird. It totally rules. WTF, people?
Ian said he never fit in with the band and he hated the album cover. I once read he smashed a whole box of records in his home because he was so disgusted. Also I guess this version of Sabbath inspired the 'Stonehenge' scene in This Is Spinal Tap. Check out this awesome story:
The album was apparently the victim of a terrible mix that had something to do with humidity + master tapes. Thats why what I'm posting here is so important. This is the unmixed, unmastered demos for the album (+ 1 song) that somehow surfaced in 2004 and it's fucking rad. This album has never received an official release on CD which is weird but fuck it. These demos are better anyway. One of my faves.
Being the little brother of an established rock star is a mixed blessing. Sure you can get more hype for your crap band but you will forever be in the shadow of the dickhead that kicked your ass when you were little. Here at Ill Con Labs we have been doing extensive research on the phenomena of little brother bands and we have come to this conclusion: THEY ARE ALL SHITTY.
Deep inside Ill Con LABS
Through many years of studying we can now bring you the definitive list of THE TOP SIX SHITTY LITTLE BROTHER BANDS EVER (after the jump)!
Sorry ladies and gents, I just realized its been almost two weeks since my last post here at IllCon (found here). Man, I'm slacking hard these days! (these damn classes I'm taking are getting in the way... fuckin' A!)
To be brutally honest, I was a bit disappointed in all y'all out there as no one commented on my last post (again, found here) so I have no idea whether it was worthy or not. However people have been downloading the shit out of the link I provided so it is safe to assume that someone, somewhere out there must dig it, right?
Shit...
So in light of my absence here on IllCon as of late, I present you with this slab of awesomeness!! Are you excited?! You should be excited, as it is m@#$%!@#$%!@g DEATH STRIKE!! Bro!! Dude, man!
Straight out of Chicago, Illinois, Death Strike formed in 1984, long before many of the so-called "death metal" bands of today were even kernels of inspiration; long before the scenesters of today were barely even out of their diapers, including myself. They released one demo in 1985 under the same title name as their full length, Fuckin' Death, which was released in 1991. The band split sometime in 1992 after-which members went on to other bands, most notably the almighty Master. The sound is crude, reminiscent of Celtic Frost and Hell Hammer with some elements of hardcore but is just as heavy and brutal as any other release during that time. It reminds me of an earlier, more crude version of Usurper at times. If anything, this release provides an interesting bit of retrospective in terms of understanding the origins of the death metal scene, particularly here in the States.
To quote ANUS, Death Strike are "[o]ne of the founding death metal acts... combin[ing] raging hardcore mayhem with old school metal to create a low-end flesh destroying death metal nightmare." Enough said!
Mention the name Trevor Jones to people and they will probably shrug their shoulders with indifference. Mention the films Dark Crystal, Labyrinth, Excalibur, Runaway Train or Dark City and they might have heard of a couple of those ( you would hope they have, if anyone ever denies hearing about or seeing one or more of these films, they can't be trusted!). Well Trevor Jones was responsible for the music to all of those.
I could recount Jones's career and what not but you can read all about him on Wikipedia so lets jut skip that and jump to the post, his atmospheric score to Alan Parker's supernatural 1987 flick, Angel Heart.
If you are familiar with the film ( you should be, if not then rectify this personal failure), then you will know about the claustrophobic atmosphere and general creepiness it exudes. Trevor Jones managed to capture this mood perfectly with a score that feels like a constantly shifting musical suite rather than separate tracks. Starting as it does with the mournful saxophone and creeping synths before moving into the downtrodden blues and thumping heartbeat of the second half, punctuated throughout with sampled dialogue detailing Mickey Rourke's doomed search. Its been my "drive to work" album for the past few weeks, my co-workers hate me for it.
I could have sworn Cobras had done a review of Infernal Majesty's None Shall Defy a while back but I could not locate it for the life of me.Maybe it's been buried deep within IllCon's catacombs? Maybe it was taken off mysteriously by those mysterious aliens?
Perhaps Bigfoot decided to come in and pummel it completely from record? Maybe it was sequestered by the pesky folks up there in D.C. in a similar manner to what happened at Megaupload? Or maybe Alex Jones is at it again and elves came, worked their magic, and stole it?
Whatever the case, I was originally going to feature Infernal Majesty's second album, Unholier Than Thou, but why not feature both albums?! Saweet! Thanks dude!! (You know you will be thanking me later!)
You know what I like about this band? They did what Slayer could not. They continued producing sick ass tunes. They did not get watered down by the music industry. They didn't grow beyond their music and act like they invented the genre or anything of the sort. And on top of that, they did not become egotistical pussies (talk about undisputed attitude!). Don't get me wrong, I highly respect Slayer's first 5 albums. In fact, I love Slayer! I still consider both Show No Mercy and Reign In Blood as favorites of mine. I even have a soft spot for Seasons... andDivine Intervention was a solid album to boot! However, the Slayer of today is like a decrepit version of the Slayer of yesterday. They simply are trying too hard now and their music has suffered. But I'm not here to talk about Slayer, I'm here to talk about one of Canada's finest!
OK, perhaps a little more on Slayer for a moment... Some consider Infernal Majesty a Slayer rip-off. OK, that's true to a point. Slayer were highly influential. Many bands followed their recipe. In the beginning of Infernal Majesty's career there is an obvious Slayer influence and their tone and approach were parallel to Slayer's at times but they went beyond that by adding an element of (if I dare say)black metal, technical thrash, and later death metal to the mix (rumor had it Corpsegrinder from Cannibal Corpse was doing live vocals for them recently). With that said, Infernal Majesty are therefore not a Slayer rip-off. They continue to shred, they slay, and pummel the listener into oblivion... Something Slayer seemingly has struggled to do on recent albums.
The band itself originated from Canada in 1986, so that should be a testament to how awesome they are. I mean Canada has thus far produced some of the best music, including metal, period. Bands such as Gorguts, Slaughter, Exciter, Sacrifice, Kataklysm, Malicious Intent, Razor, Revenge, and Blasphemy all came out from the boreal forest and tundra that makes up much of our neighbor to the north. Maybe there is something to be said about the cold, windswept climate up there that produces solid, no bullshit music? Who knows.
Anyways, None Shall Defy happens to be in my top-twenty, possibly even top-ten albums of all time. Unholier Than Thou is also a great album that is highly underrated but it does have its' flaws. The track, "Roman Song", is probably their strongest on the album as it shows Infernal Majesty at their best, however there is something about None Shall Defy that simply has not been topped, by both their contemporaries and the band itself.
So rather than me blabbering on for days about how great these releases are, I suggest you check them out for yourself!
Back for more. Part 1 ( I'm not going to link it as you would miss the sweet Herpes post below ) whet your appetite about some classic arcade gaming. Well I have carried on my trawl through the arcade classics I remember and picked out more of my favourites that are worthy of a go still to this day. Lets get down to it.
Bad Dudes Vs. DragonNinja (1988)
One of those games that every arcade had, also one of those games that everyone had at home as it was ported to nearly every home computer going. Despite being easier on the home versions it still gave you a little more edge over the competition when it came down to playing it in public.
The game had you attempting to rescue President Ronny ( Reagan ) from the DragonNinja. You constantly get asked if your a bad enough dude to take on the job despite your character proclaiming he's "bad" after every stage. They ain't even satisfied when you beat the shit out of waves and waves of enemy ninjas, dogs, ladies in bondage gear and various boss characters.
Once you manage to defeat the the evil DragonNinja, you get this pretty sweet ending......
Lucky & Wild (1992)
This was the coolest game when I was a kid. For those of us that grew up watching Lethal Weapon, Starsky & Hutch and Tango & Cash, this was the only way to live out those fantasies. It wasn't a very popular machine due to the size it required, but you had hit gold if any amusement had it. First off, check the machine......
That's right! Driving as well as shooting! With two guns! It might be a common thing these days but back in the late 80's/early 90's, only Chase HQ had the police chase, shooting and driving angle really nailed. Lucky & Wild allowed you and a buddy to be cops chasing down and shooting the shit out of everything on screen.
Check the video.............
Mute the sound as its pretty annoying listening to some bozo talking through it.
Pretty sweet looking eh? The attraction of it was the absolute chaos it seemed to involve. You drove through malls and restaurants while blasting bad guys apart! At its heart it was a standard rail shooter, to my young mind it was the nearest I would ever get to being involved in high speed shoot-outs.
Hot bitches
Plus sweet chase music
I am pretty sure this is the king of my mispent, childhood, arcade loitering.
Vendetta (1991)
At one point in time, any urban set, revenge themed beat em up wouldn't have been taken seriously if it didn't have the title screen set on a graffiti strewn brick wall. That was a cast iron certificate that you would see fist/face interface action. Vendetta was a sort of sequel to the Double Dragon rip off Crime Fighters, it was a pretty standard rescue-your-girl-from-nasty-dudes. Now, lots of games dealt with this theme, Vendetta changed it up with the chance to have 3 of your friends back you up. Allowing you to throw each other into enemies and such.
Vendetta added a ton more violence than Final Fight or Double Dragon had, this was what had me coming back. You could hold enemies down and wail on their torso, smash barrels over heads, kick down scaffolding, smash sacks of cement around their faces, tons of pretty rough stuff. Get your hands on a baseball bat with nails or a chain and you could carve your way through the enemies.
Hot bitches and fire.
Your gang is called Cobras.
Rogues gallery.
Did I also mention the pretty bitchin' soundtrack courtesy of Castlevania composer Michiru Yamane? You bet I did.
Personally, these where my favourites. I always had a few more that I played pretty regular like Captain Commando, Knights of The Round, Narc, Vigilante and some others. Anyone want to throw their own favourites in?
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