V8 - Luchando Por El Metal (1983)

I've written a few pieces on my admiration for various Central and South American metal bands and the manner in which they could absorb the severity of their circumstances into their music, transmuting it into an extremity paralleled by few other artists before or since. Bands like Parabellum, Herpes, and Hadez all churned out some of the most vicious, atonal, bomb-blast anti-music ever commited to tape but I would hate to imply that all the brutality of authoritarian regimes, drug-fuled corruption, and some of the bloodier moments of Cold War spillover necessarily forced musicians into the realms of quasi-listenable discordance. There were antecedents, unique for their time and place but not really remembered for the boundary pushing of their harsher followers.  

V8 is one such band. They're widely believed to be Argentina's first metal band and it's not hard to pick out what they were attempting. Their first album, 1983's Luchando Por El Metal (Fighting For Metal – for those unversed in Spanish) almost seems a sort of missing link between late NWOBHM and early speed metal, but whereas the former genre was comprised of bands who tended to release a killer EP or two and then either fall apart or make an album consisting mainly of shitty filler material and the latter focused more on technical ability and falsetto vocals, Luchando Por El Metal is rock solid and stocked front to back with well-written catchy tunes, almost punk-ish in their rawness, not a million miles removed from a rougher Kill 'Em All (which was released four months later). 

My Spanish is a bit rusty, but from what I can tell V8's hatred of both society and hippies was surpassed only by their devotion to heavy metal (the introduction to “Parcas Sangrientas” gives way to the heavily accented shout of “HEAVY MET-AL!” in case there was any question or doubt where their alliegences lay). And it may be easy to have a laugh at the single-mindedness of it all except for two things: first, in 1979 Argentina was still a military dictatorship that had withstood decades of de facto civil war, withV8 forming during the most repressive era of that regime's rule, a time when rock music was banned and anybody performing it did so at their own peril – imprisonment and forced disappearances were the order of the day – making the act of being in a metal band one requiring a level of bravery most musicians would have trouble mustering; and second, the album fucking rules. It's a total ripper, a rager, a torpedo bonzer, and ass-pounder of the highest order. Anybody who claims to like awesome things and doesn't like this needs to take a good, long look at themselves in the mirror and try to figure out where their head's at.

V8 may have had some analogs in the Motörheads and Judas Priests of the world, but to say their music wasn't new or different not only isn't really the point, but it lays bare the cultural privelege at the heart of being able to denigrate the relevance of something because it's reminiscent of something else. V8 was new and different, at least in relation to their corner of the world, and their popularity there attests to the vacuum that they filled for the generation of people who needed something as bracing, cathartic, and anarchic as metal to be able to come to terms with a social structure so rigorously and vehemently opposed to the freer expressions of the human spirit. Also it fucking rules. 

--

V8 - Luchando Por El Metal 

KARP - Demo 1993

KARP is the best.

Karp are universally hailed as the great lost hope of metal. Those that were lucky enough to see them live had our faces melted off our asses kicked. I'm not going to go into too much about this great band from Washington because we all know almost everything about these bros (Cobras wrote about them here). Jared is in Big Business now, who are also in Melvins. Sheesh.



Karp released 3 full lengths and a crapload of singles and eps in their short (8 year) career. There is a recent documentary about them that you should check out.

Last year this amazing demo suddenly appeared from 1993. It was released on cassette shortly before their first album was released. It rules. Get it here. 

A Beginner's Guide To Ejaculating Everywhere.

Rising from the dollar bin like a coked-out phoenix clad in midriff-baring shirt and three days worth of stubble comes fucking Diamond Reo. Not to be confused with the country band whose name only varies by one letter (apparently this particular band took their name from the same automotive company that supplied the appellation for Reo Speedwagon), the group of lowlives in question came out of Pittsburgh in the early 70s, offered up a few albums, much of which was thoroughly forgettable Mott The Hoople knockoff bullshit, but in the middle managed the brilliant scum-rock sleaze of Dirty Diamonds.

Most of it's mid-tempo Rust Belt butt-rock of the sort that saw its apex between 1971 and 1974. Copious cowbell abuse propping up the basest of Mark Farner aspirations. The album's opener, “All Over You,” is about ejaculating (all over, as the title specifies) somebody. And while none of the other songs really get to that level of base dumbness, it definitely establishes the general tone of the album. Take “It's A Jungle Out There” - a tribute to the toughness necessary to survive the rough-and-tumble urban life, that sounds like a half-speed prophecy of “Welcome To The Jungle” both in riff and lyrical conceit and is especially funny considering none of these dudes look exactly like the kick-ass-and-take-names type. Or “Boys Will Be Boys,” a paean to dudes who do dude stuff with other dudes (possibly as homoerotic as I just made it sound, I dunno). A few tracks pick up the pace to something not a million miles removed from the NWOBHM that was congealing across the pond around the same time, but this had nothing to do with leather and spikes crowd singing about swords and dragons.

It's pure id music, all libido, adrenaline, and testosterone - subtlety (and shirts that cover the full torso) be damned. It ain't special but there's not much better for drinking a few six packs of Mickey's alone on the porch in the middle of the afternoon with all the doors open or changing your own oil or something. It's ridiculous as shit and twice as dumb but it's a fun listen, a regional anachronism, a time capsule from the era of quadrophonic sound and quaaludes. Turn the shit up and get dumb as fuck.

                                                                                     

"It on your face / It's in your hair / It's down your back / Girl, it's everywhere"

Total Summertime Superdistorto Good Time Destruction

So, a few beers deep last night, Cobras and I got into a trans-continental bout of posting a bunch of 70s protometal summer jams on Facebook.  I figured I could share some of that and put up a mix of shit like that I made a month or two ago for partying purposes.  It ain't comprehensive, it's poorly researched, and ignores things that most people like.  So yeah.  Just a smattering of proto-metal, meathead, scuzz rock fuzzbombs from the golden age of quaaludes and tube amps. 

1. Lucifer's Friend - Ride In The Sky
Best thing this fucking band ever did.  It's like if Zeppelin decided to skip the eunuch Viking war cry on "Immigrant Song" and throw on some bleating horns and Hammond organ. 

2. Randy Holden - Guitar Song
I decided to skip some of the bigger names in this style (Sabbath, Blue Cheer, etc.), and while Holden was a member of Blue Cheer for one album it'd be a mistake to overlook this one.  The question I have regarding this song relates to the title.  Aren't ALL Randy Holden songs guitar songs?  Least descriptive title ever.  Might as well have called it fucking "Music Song" or "Song With Structure" or something.


3. Cool Feet - Burning Desire
Fucking sick album from Luxembourg circa '76.  Apparently only 200 were pressed, so good luck ever finding an actual copy of this that doesn't cost about the same as a downpayment on a house in a respectable neighborhood with good schools and curbside recycling.  It's got everything though: tinny mid-fi production, harmonized guitars, broken English lyrics.  If you hate this you're an asshole.


4. Stray - Jericho
I love ANY song with a galloping beat.

5. Frijid Pink - Crying Shame
This band had a balance between gnarly overdriven fuzz stomp and some sorta-corny-but-sorta awesome AOR boogie slop.  Gotta love any heavy band that genuinely uses the phrase "golly gee" in the lyrics. 

6. Grannie - Saga of the Sad Jester
Apparently the Grannie LP is one of the most valuable records in the world.  Even the fucking repress sells for a cool hundo.  Can't say I get it.  A lot of it sounds like an anemic Wishbone Ash.  But this song is pretty cool, like an anemic Wishbone Ash in a good way.

7. the Scorpions - It All Depends
I know I said I was gonna stay away from bigger names, but this doesn't count.  The Scorpions circa the early '70s were a totally different beast than what they'd become later.  Even though it's the same members, it might as well be a separate fucking band.  This album and it's successor are killer.  Shame what they'd become.

8. Flower Travellin' Band - Kamikaze
The Japanese Sabbath, if one were inclined towards clumsy cross-cultural analogies that fall short of their intended purpose.  Most people would go with the "Satori" album, with good reason.  But this one sounds like it could've been an out-take from that record, so fuck it.  Excruciatingly goddamn killer band. 

9. Råg I Ryggen - Det Kan Väl Inte Vara Farligt
Fuck man these Swedes kill it.  This is for all the people (like me) who, when they hear the term "prog rock", just assume its gonna be a bunch of Guitar Center employees with 37-string guitars and pony tails. Definitely intricate musically, but that doesn't undermine the heaviness.

10. Titanic - Macumba
Same deal as the last song.  Yeah, it's proggy, but it's also got some heft to it.  And it's catchy as a motherfucker.  It would surprise me if this DIDN'T turn up sampled on a Kanye West song.

11. Captain Beyond - Raging River Of Fear
This album is fucking perfect.  More technically sophisticated than most heavy bands of the era, heavier than most technically sophisticated bands.  Proto-prog-metal with more than a small amount of Southern rock thrown in.

12. Baby Grandmothers - Somebody Keeps Calling My Name
Apparently, this band's claim to fame was supporting Hendrix during his '68 Swedish tour.  But pretty much every burnout old rock dude from this era has some story about opening for Hendrix, or learning some licks from him, or buying drugs for him.  So you know, grain of salt.  Still a good record.  It can get a little jammy, but they manage to tie it all together, feng shui-ing their shit with some weird-ass vocals.

13. Cindy Und Bert - Der Hund Von Baskerville
This totally fucking happened.
                                                                                
 Fuzz Bomb Apocalypse Summer Jam Series Vol. 1

Oakhelm - Betwixt and Between (2007)

Regular IllCon followers should know of the name Pete Jay and the quality musical output he has been part of. Quality shit such as Wormwood and Black Queen, both can be obtained here, and also of the all-mighty Assuck for those unacquainted.
Pete has been busying himself with Oakhelm (alongside members of the also pretty awesome Fall of The Bastards and Lovecraft inspired Aldebaran)  for some time now. I discovered this album a few months ago and it became something of a regular on my daily work route and then by chance I happened across the impressive green/yellow vinyl pressing of this in a second hand store. Both these events made up my mind about sharing it with you guys.
Oakhelm play a brand of black metal influenced by Viking and folk themes as much as double bass and raspy vocals. The whole Viking thing has never been something I really got when it came to the various sub-genres of metal that populate the musical landscape these days. I always found it somewhat cheesy at the best of times. Maybe its growing older or just a maturing of my musical palette but the tastefully composed acoustic breaks, chanting and well placed samples ( they actually recorded waves crashing against the shore, rainfall and a crackling campfire) just click with the rampant double bass, harsh riffing, twin leads and dual vocals. Some solid, Viking and folk influenced black metal from solid players.

Download

Buy

Metal Archives

On a unrelated note, I am beginning to compile the next part in the When drawing Goes Wrong series, Photoshop Abortions. Of course dealing with those heinous photo shopped album covers we all know. I thought I would throw it open to the IllCon contingency after the snowball of mentally crippled art posts and community high fiving that resulted in the superb MS paint thread. Anyway, if you know of any special needs, photo shopped terribleness in art form, then feel free to share it with us. You can email whipit@hotmail.co.uk or message via here and here.

Scoring Spice

“Dune. Desert Planet. Arrakis. WATER.” --Kyle McLaughlin, in Lynch’s Magnum Opus, Dune
“Dune, where’s my car?” --Cobras

Many bands have tried and failed to capture the essence of Frank Herbert’s seminal, epic, orientalist space-opera, DUNE. For some, it might have been better if they had tried and died. 


It would be well-nigh impossible to document every Dune-inspired track in the universe, so these are but a sampling of the many existing varieties of Dune music. They are grouped in brackets because, as Paul Atreides has observed, "the worst potential competition for any young organism can come from its own kind."


Techno Bracket
Eon let loose in 1991 with a couple Dune-themed tracks, "The Spice Must Flow" and "Fear: The Mindkiller." "Fear: The Mindkiller" is a clear ancestor of the Mortal Kombat theme song, and samples (you guessed it!) the line "fear is the mind killer" a few thousand times. For good measure, Eon throws in a healthy dose of what sounds like the panting from Kraftwerk's "Tour De France." Because that's what Kraftwerk is awesome for-- panting.

Not shown: panting. Shown: nerding.

As bad as this may be, however, it’s still better than “German techno-pop ensemble from Münster Dune,” because by "techno pop" they mean Happy Hardcore. If you don’t know what that is, take a moment to thank the gods. You are either too young, too old, or were too under-a-rock-in-the-90s to have been exposed to this toxin. Preserve your innocence/health. If you must know, a representative track is "Can't Stop Raving," but don't say I didn't warn you. Also, Dune’s youtube page would have you know that the group is “named after the 1984 science fiction movie directed by David Lynch.” Yup. Straight from the source.

Winner: no one. No one is a winner here.

Metal Bracket
Another band of Krauts, Golem, attacked the Dune concept in their 1998 album “The 2nd Moon.” Check out the first track, The Wanderers. Featuring succinct riffage and abstract/subtly ESL lyrics (see e.g.: “Unlocking the gates of time, widening its bounds/Guarded by the maker ...facing desert ground”), Golem may actually have what it takes to make a Kwisatz Hadderach.



A further solid entry comes from Aussie rock band Buffalo (mentioned in a previous Cobras post), whose Dune Messiah takes us on a Pentagram-esque journey to Arrakis (and admit it, you always wanted to go to Arrakis with Pentagram). 

Pretty sure it would be like this...

Blind Guardian also pays a visit to the Dune-iverse in Traveller in Time. The morning sun! Of Dune! Good old Blind Guardian. If you haven’t heard this song, it’s pretty much exactly what you would expect from Blind Guardian (i.e., it is awesome, unabashed nerdery). They can really play their balisets ifyouknowwhatimean.

Picard Knows.

Also, according to a reliable source (wikipedia, duh), Iron Maiden tried to name To Tame A Land “Dune,” but Frank Herbert was having none of it. Apparently the band was told that "Frank Herbert doesn't like rock bands, particularly heavy rock bands, and especially bands like Iron Maiden." Good call on that one, F. Herb. 

Frank Herbert hates you. 

PS: Dreamtheater fans will be delighted to admit to you that Dreamtheater covered "To Tame A Land."  

Winner: Vote your choice in the comments. You are the dungeonmaster! You get to decide!

• Blind Guardian
• Buffalo
• Golem
• Iron Maiden
• Dreamtheater

Prog/Jazz Bracket

More to F. Herb’s taste might be the smooth stylings of one Dave Matthews (!), a jazz keyboardist from Kentucky who hung out with James Brown and was apparently moved to gather together a bunch of other jazz players (Grover Washington, Eric Gale) and write several Dune-themed songs which readers should check out at their own risk. These are all on a 1977 album Dave Matthews titled, wait for it, “Dune.” The creativity here just does not end... or at least, not until the second side of the album, where Dave gives us NOT ONLY a disco-fied version of the Star Wars main theme (it was 1977, so Lucas didn’t quite know what he had on his hands), but also a limp cover of David Bowie's Space Oddity. On a related note, the only tolerable part of the latter song was sampled by MF (“Metal Face/Fingers”) Doom in Rap Snitch Knishes. You know. Like you do. Wait, what was I talking about?

Ah yes. Another entry in the Dune prog bracket are French prog rockers Dün, about whom we have previously heard. An interesting compare and contrast exercise may be done by playing Dave Matthew's "Arrakis" and Dün's “Arrakis” back to back. Go on. Try it.






Winner:

• Dave Matthews
• Dün

Video Game Bracket
Yes, evidently there were at least two about a million soundtracked Dune videogames. Kids these days. Don’t they know about books? Require a little effort on your part, make no be-be-be-be-beeps. Anywho.

1992 saw the release of not one, but TWO Dune videogames. The first was called “Dune” by Cryo Interactive, and it carried a soundtrack called "Dune: Spice Opera." It’s not so bad, from what I can tell. Also, at 1:55 of the track embedded below, "Sign of the Worm," you can see a sweet rendering of Shai-Hulud in 1992 graphics. 

  
A competing video game company, Westwood Studios, released “Dune II” that same year; check out this sweet dialogue: “We were your pawns and Dune was your board.” The score is basically 8-bit plus. In 1998, Westwood Studios released “Dune: 2000” scored in part by professional video game composer Frank Klepaki. Good old Frank K. does a musical homage to/rip off of Toto’s score to Lynch’s Dune here on this track at about 3:22-32; otherwise, this is fairly unremarkable stuff.


Winner:

• Dune: Spice Opera
• Dune II
• Klepaki
• No one, again

Dune OST Bracket
The Lynch Dune OST has been reported on here, but I thought I might add a few words. Two of those words are "Brian Eno." Two more words are “fuck yeah.”

but of course there is a fuckyeaheno.com

For the sake of completeness, here is the theme music from the Dune television series, composed by the dude who did the soundtrack to Final Destination V. If you have ever watched any sci-fi movie and heard some generic background symphonics, you’ve basically heard it. Speaking of orientalism, there’s also a Bonus New Age Track.


Winner: Toto/Eno OST. I’m sorry, this is just objective. Please send your complaints to James Madison.

Well, there you have it, friends. A smattering of the aural representations of the Dune-iverse. Please feel free to add on in the comments.

Behold Kris Mar, newest addition to the IllCon Team! Hail Kris Mar! May the rivers run red with the blood of your fallen foes, and may vampires tremble and expire at your feet just as they do under the mighty ax of Abe Lincoln!
I am impressed with the nerdiness contained herein, please feel free to contribute further in the future. Sweet.

-Cobras

No Visible Scars

As my esteemed colleague, Judge Shredd, mentioned below, We are in the end times. You only have to look at the economic and environmental situations across the globe, the rampant crime and disease rates, mankind has run its course. Mother Nature isn't too happy anymore and Megaupload is gone. We are facing extinction.
During these bleak times you need bleak music to soundtrack those last few heartbeats and breaths escaping you as the world slows down.
No Visible Scars managed to gain my attention with the 1970's/80's Giallo/Exploitation/Porn inspired artwork and imagery, they're love of the timeless C-90 tape,  and the fact quite a few of the digital releases are free. Most Illcon followers should be able to relate to one of those. I decided to give a heads up on a few of the releases worth investigating.

Elders Of The Apocalypse - The Law Of Iron (2011)

Get it

Nasty and ragged, thrashy death metal by guys with nasty names such as Plague Bearer and Sadistik Slayer. I guess the term "war metal" suits this best. I can hear elements of Kreator and Sodom in there alongside some  Bestial Warlust black noise and a slew of suitably apocalyptic samples. Awesome cover art included.

Nightbitch - Sex And Magic promo (2010)

Get it

This is the one I have been digging the most. Comprising the smooth pipes of that dude from Hour Of 13 with some total NWOBHM riffing crossed with proto-Doom jams. THIS SHIT ROCKS. This was a 3-track promo for the EP of the same name. They don't seem to have much else available but they have connections to a whole host of other bands according to Encyclopedia Metallum.

Poison Tongue - Lick You Sweety (2010)

Get it

That cover seem pretty attractive doesn't it? Bit more left field this time. Poison Tongue is Giallo/Exploitation inspired noisescapes. Its not full on harsh noise ( though it gets plenty harsh in places) but more ambient and unsettling due to the schizophrenic changes in volume and pacing. Kind of like those quiet bits in between Goblin freak outs crossed with Beherit's noise tendencies.

There you go gang. They have the usual places online here and here. I'm digging this label a lot recently. You should to.

Pagan Altar - Volume 1 (1982)

I'm not entirely sure what to put here to be honest. This band simply rules. Pure, plain, and simple and if you think otherwise, I'm not sure what to tell you other than: "...that's a bloody shame!" As I sit here typing in between my Ecology class and Senior capstone class, I am actually wearing a Pagan Altar shirt. Yep, you heard me correct! I'm THAT much of a fan...

Normally I'd discuss the band in more depth, and I'd probably would disclose more detail on my introduction and experience with the band, but seeing as I only have a few spare minutes to type said post, and furthermore I still have yet to run to the restroom, then eat, and prepare for my next class of course - not to mention get to the damned class on time - I'm going to leave you with this:

This band rules. Period. This release, titled Volume 1, was Pagan Altar's first full length and recorded in 1982 but was not officially released until 1998. If you're a fan of doom metal, and further NWOBHM, you cannot go wrong with this release. Fans of Black Sabbath, Witchcraft, Candlemass, Angel Witch and Pentagram look no further!
This is truly a great listen and is recommended to all who are into heavy metal, doom, and rock. Again, this band rules.

Get it Here, Here,
or Here

Metallum / Last.FM

Official Website

Stallone soundtrack pump up/round up.

The joys and awesomeness of movie montage music have been extolled many a time here on Illcon. From the awesome Blood Bros mix-tapes to Cobra's in-house work out mix, we all know how hard they rule as well as the obvious mental and physical benefits that can be attained from listening to such down right manly, life affirming and brutally cool tunes.
Now, your probably wondering what all this is leading to? Well, as a sucker for soundtracks in general I routinely go through my collection and realised that out of everything I have, there is one actor who seems to have dominance over the rest of my OST shelf, that one man is Mr Sylvester Stallone.

On closer inspection I realised that he also seems to have the most relevance when it comes to pump up montages ( as well as more often than not having soundtracks that are far more entertaining than the actual films they correspond to). I mean, Rocky is the main culprit when it comes down to it. In fact, the first 4 Rocky films possess enough sweaty working out set to awesome rock music footage to power a small country. Eye of The Tiger, case in point. The ruling Kingpin of montage riffary. So in the Illcon spirit of educated the uneducated, I have pulled out my personal picks of the Stallone OST library for you good people to enjoy, kick back, work out and be cool to.

Various Artists - Rocky IV

Starting of with the undisputed king of pump up soundtracks, Rocky IV. The first Rocky film I ever saw also possesses the best of the series music. Of course Eye of The Tiger is here, but so is No Easy Way Out, Sweetest Victory and Hearts On Fire. Not to mention Vince Dicola's two instrumental ass-kickers. Pure montage fury. I'm also pretty sure the film has more montages per reel than any other film.

If he dies, he die.

Various Artists - Over The Top

I don't think anyone knew where Stallone was going with this film, I am pretty sure he didn't either but he made damn sure the soundtrack was solid. Ignore the stinkers from his brother Frank and the limp effort by Kenny Loggins, just focus on Sammy Hagar's timeless Winner Takes It All. Asia's Gypsy Soul, Larry Greene's Take It Higher and Giorgio Moroder's instrumental The Fight. Need a soundtrack for your next Tuesday arm wrestling meet up? Here you go.

Weiner takes it all.

Harold Faltermeyer - Tango & Cash

Can a buddy cop movie go wrong? Even with Kurt Russell involved? I am afraid so. Case in point, Tango & Cash. Despite a pretty okay chemistry between the Kurtster and Stallone, Robert Z'dar swinging his giant chin around and some pretty sweet cowboy boots with a gun hidden in the heel, this was a surprisingly lumpen affair. The same can't be said of the classy score courtesy of the main man Harold Faltermeyer though. Combining the upbeat, streetwise sounds of his Beverly Hills Cop score alongside the more brooding work he cultivated on The Running Man, Mr Faltermeyer pulls another winner out the bag.

 Rambo? Rambo's a pussy.

Various Artists - Cobra

Believe it or not, this was originally what Beverly Hills Cop was going to be like. After being pushed off the project, Stallone vowed he would make the film he intended. The result was Cobra. Awesome for being so lame on so many levels. The soundtrack is worthwhile for Jean Beauvoir;s Feel The Heat, Gary Wright's lost classic Hold On To Your Vision and the instrumental efforts by Sylvester Levay. Perfect music to soundtrack some rogue policing.

This is where the law stops and I start - sucker!

Keith Emerson - Nighthawks

You decide to make a movie about Billy Dee Williams and Stallone chasing a crazed, European bomber as he blows up innocent people. Who would you get to soundtrack it? How about organ destroying, keyboard pioneer Keith Emerson? Superb idea. Emerson crafted a pretty solid score with this one. In a very similar way to Lalo Schiffrin approaching his work on Dirty Harry from a jazz background, Emerson approached Nighthawks with a head full of prog keyboard noodling and worked unhindered until it was complete.

There is no security

All this awesomeness has made me wonder when the montage actually came into use? I remember Rocky from being a kid but did such a thing exist in the 60's or 70's?

Don't say we never give you nuthin'

Not content with finishing off my Eno series with style, verve, moxie, chutzpah and aplomb, I have also taken it upon myself to give you good good people a couple of small christmas gifts. Call it a token of our esteem from us here at the IllCon compound for it is, after all, the season of goodwill and so forth.




















I did sneakily foreshadow this post in my last one, mentioning, as I did,'writing bollocks about massively overlooked bands from New Zealand' and my enthusiasm for the TV cartoon 'Adventure Time WIth Finn & Jake', so that may well give you a clue as to at least some of the content herein.




















So, my first gift here- just a small one really - is an alternate version of the theme tune to 'Adventure Time'. I find the main theme to be the weakest thing about the show - far too indie and twee for my sensitive ears - so coming across this version that borders on Fancy Metal was pretty darned algebraic for me...



Now, I'm sure there'll be the usual naysayers out there slinging the 'H' word around and blah blah blah, but to those people I say 'SHUT THE FUCK UP'. You soulless cunts, you probably don't like the goddamn Muppets either, and I don't fucking trust people who don't like the goddamn Muppets.


















...aaaaaand relax.

My main present is something that I'm pretty damn sure isn't currently to be found anywhere else on t'internet. That's right people, we got us an EXCLUSIVE. First, though, I gotta ask, does the name 'Shihad' mean anything to anyone?




















If your answer is 'yes', then you probably already know just how damn good their first few records were and you may well already have a copy of the recording(s) that I'm about post.
However, if your answer is a no then I think you're in for a treat. Here's a wee taster to whet your whistle...



Pretty damn rockin' huh? Kinda 'Helmet-y' y'think? Hell, have another...



Yup. I dig 'em.

Both tracks come from 'Killjoy', Shihad's second LP, which was released back in 1995 and is one of my all-time favourite records.
Their debut EP 'Devolve' and their first LP, and first international release, 'Churn' (produced by Killing Joke's Jaz Coleman, fact fans!) were pretty decent, but 'Killjoy' is just a BEAST. Blessed with a rhythm section that pumps like the engine on an exceptionally fine ship-of-the-line and some right noisy guitars, 'Killjoy' totally rocks my world. Hell, those guitars that crash back in at 3.24 during 'Bitter' sound less like guitars and more like heavy steel cables lashing against one another. KILLER.

I was lucky enough to see them live on their European tour in support of 'Killjoy'- although not, alas, in their Faith No More support slot - and can wholeheartedly say that they were a fucking fantastic live band too.




















As I said earlier, I haven't been able to find this posted ANYWHERE else on the internet, so consider yourselves very lucky boys and girls. I've even added the two B-sides from the 'You Again' CD Single - one of which is a cover of Bowie's 'Boys Keep Swinging' - AND the two Shihad tracks from their 'Happy Families' Split CD with fellow Kiwi lunatics Head Like A Hole. These are all from my own personal, deeply cherished, CDs so you'd damn well better appreciate 'em!


















Get 'Killjoy' by Shihad Here.



















Now, just before I leave you to slip further into your Turkey/Tofurkey-with-all-the-trimmings induced comas, I'd just like to add that Shihad still exist - their website can be found here - but they have done nothing of worth since their highly divisive 1996 self-titled LP, so if you decide to go digging around online after getting all fired up by 'Killjoy', don't say I didn't warn you.