Thursday, January 7, 2010


There’s this band from Austin called Blackholicus. I’m still not confidant in the proper pronunciation of their name but it doesn’t matter because nobody I know has ever heard of them. I’m usually like, “no, not Blackalicious, Black-HOLICUS, like holocaust”. And I’m off to a good start.

sounds just like it looks

Things you need to know about Blacholicus: They are young, they rip hard, they play stoney NWOBHM with punky female vocals and there is nothing broootaly-tru-kvlt-melo-blackened-tech-death-core about them. Their sound is bare bones, their songwriting is straightforward and most importantly, their true and undying love for metal beams through your speakers. I listen to these records and I’m thinking, man these guys are awesome, fuck they love metal. I love metal too, I bet we’d be bros.

future bros

The metal spirit is strong in this band and the riffage is totally worthy. Like Witchfinder General, the execution is endearingly sloppy and the low-fi quality of the recording adds a raw authenticity to their sound. They don’t hide behind triple layer rhythm guitars or beat detective drum shredding. Their sound is exposed, vulnerable and unashamed. So if you’re not into epic, videogame esc, lofi guitar harmonies, then you should probably go listen to something that’s more tailored to your douche bag tastes. Like Suicide Silence.

Added bonus: Blackholicus is totally bonable. For instance, a lot of girls wont be that stoked if you put on Gorgoroth for a bone down sesh. You bone down to Girlschool, early Scorps, or even Pagan Altar (for slow, doom humping), but the fact remains that the majority of our metal catalogue is not appropriate for romantic conquests. Blackholicus however is completely bedroom safe and getting your girlfriend high and boning to this record is probably the coolest thing you will do all day.


Here is a link to their first record, Variations in Death Minor from 2006. Their new record, Megaforte, just came out and it SMOKES. Buy it.




Shelby Cobras said...

I don't usually laugh out loud (I refuse to use that fucktarded abbreviation) while reading, but I have to admit: That part about doom-humping to Pagan Altar fucking killed me.

Nice work, never heard these guys before today. Not at all what I expected (the name seemed to imply black metal), I am more than pleasantly surprised.

Aesop said...

Ludicra had the honor of playing with them in Austin a few years back. They were stellar and very nice folks. I posted this gem way back when Hearse started. I will have to get the new one immediately. Here's a link to my write up.

See how many plugs I managed to fit in there? Ludicra has a new album coming March 3rd on Profound Lore Records. I will be cutting the ribbon at the brand new San Anselmo Galleria Mall (in front of Spencer's Gifts.)

Shelby Cobras said...

I am disappointed to see nothing here about your Decibel interview nor your DJ gig Feb 4th at The Knockout, bro.

To quote those bitchy chicks throwing tampons at Sissy Spacek:


Obliteracion Zine said...

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Obliteracion Zine.

m. alexander said...

This album fucking rips, nice post.

Anonymous said...

Dudes, ripped this from their myspace.

Our name is pronounced
Black Hole Ick Us

the name is a variation on astronomical phenomenon the black hole with the latin suffix -icus, meaning "belonging to" or "derived from"

a lot of people aren't sure how to pronounce the word so just thought I'd post this.

I will be back soon with more posts.


Shelby Cobras said...

Touche, sir.

Way to do your research!

SEANFORD said...

oh c'mon, their blog was totally a response to my blog. damn, we’ve got cross country blogversations going on right here.

Viagra said...

OK this guys are just hilarious. Never heard of them before, and probably never will after today, but this really gave me a laugh for the day

S. said...

Fantastic write-up. Also one of the greatest records in the history of the world. I caught it from the Hearse back in 2007 and still play it regularly.

Rob said...

Aw3esome words and humour. And a great band too.